I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
