Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Randomize
