maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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