She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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