Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Randomize
