i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
