I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
