she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Randomize