i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
