So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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