Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
foreskin is a definite game changer
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
