i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Randomize