We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Randomize