i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
