How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
