i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
