How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Randomize
