But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
