We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
