just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Randomize
