Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
