Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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