sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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