guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
