Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
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