i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Randomize