I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
being pregnant is like rehab
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize