Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
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