I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize
