At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize