I'm really into asian looking animals
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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