No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
