i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize