I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
