We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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