Just fell off a train. Bad.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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