you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
