For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
