Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
