i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
