I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
