Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
