God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
two words: eviction party
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
