I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
