She said her name was "party"
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
