Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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