My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
