I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Can vaginas get frostbite?
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Dicks are not precious.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
