laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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