what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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