Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
