hell yes lets make some ravioli
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
