are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
